What is Perseverance? Teaching Kids the Power of Never Giving Up
HeroType Team
August 2025
What is Perseverance? Teaching Kids the Power of Never Giving Up
Imagine two children facing the same challenge: a difficult math problem. One child tries for a few minutes, gets frustrated, and pushes the worksheet away. The other child also feels frustrated but takes a deep breath and keeps working until they find the solution.
What makes the difference? It's not intelligence, natural talent, or even prior knowledge. It's perseverance, and it's one of the most powerful predictors of success in school, relationships, and life.
Research from the National Study of Learning Mindsets shows that among 16,000 ninth-graders, 63% chose an easier assignment when given the option to avoid potential failure. This means the majority of children are naturally inclined to avoid challenges, making perseverance not just helpful, but essential for their development.
So why does training perseverance matter so much for our children, and how can we nurture this crucial character strength without overwhelming them?
What is Perseverance? More Than Just "Not Giving Up"
Perseverance is the character strength that drives someone to persist and finish what they start, despite obstacles, setbacks, and delays. It's about maintaining effort and commitment toward long-term goals, even when the path gets difficult or progress feels slow.
Think of perseverance as your child's inner superhero power—the strength that helps them push through challenges that would otherwise make them want to quit.
How Perseverance Differs from Related Traits
Parents often confuse perseverance with similar concepts, so let's clarify:
Perseverance vs. Grit: Grit combines passion and perseverance. While perseverance is about sticking with something despite difficulties, grit specifically involves maintaining effort toward very long-term goals you're passionate about.
Perseverance vs. Resilience: Resilience is bouncing back from setbacks or failures. Perseverance is continuing forward despite ongoing challenges. A resilient child recovers from disappointment; a perseverant child keeps working toward their goal even when progress is tough.
Perseverance vs. Persistence: Persistence might involve repeatedly trying the same approach. Perseverance goes deeper—it's the willingness to adapt, learn, and continue working toward a goal through various strategies and inevitable obstacles.
Why is Perseverance So Important?
Studies published in PMC reveal fascinating insights about perseverance and student achievement. In a comprehensive study of 2,272 undergraduate students, researchers found that trait-like perseverance explained 14.5% of the differences in students' GPAs. Even more encouraging? When students increased their perseverance levels, their GPAs improved by an average of 0.08 points per semester.
But here's what's particularly interesting for parents: a large-scale study from the National Study of Learning Mindsets involving 16,000 ninth-graders found that 63% of students chose an easier assignment when given the option. This suggests that many children naturally avoid challenges—making perseverance an even more critical skill to develop.
Real-World Impact
The power of perseverance extends far beyond school grades. A community college initiative focused on building perseverance raised student success rates from 15% completion in two years to 55% completion in just one year. That's not just statistical improvement—that's life-changing transformation.
However, research published in PMC's meta-analysis of 127 studies provides important context: perseverance alone accounts for only 1.4-6.3% of variance in successful outcomes. The key insight? Perseverance works best when combined with passion. This means helping your child find what they care about is just as important as teaching them to stick with it.
The Brain Science Behind Perseverance
Neuroscience research published in the Journal of Neuroscience shows that perseverance engages the prefrontal cortex—the brain region responsible for executive functions like decision-making and self-regulation. When children practice perseverance, they're literally strengthening their brain's ability to handle challenges.
Even more fascinating, research from the Brain First Institute found that children with acceptance-based coping styles maintained perseverance levels even when experiencing negative emotions. This suggests that teaching kids to accept and work through difficult feelings, rather than avoiding them, is crucial for developing true perseverance.
Is Perseverance a Character Trait? Understanding Character Development
Yes, perseverance is absolutely a character trait—and a crucial one. The VIA Institute on Character places perseverance under the virtue of courage, emphasizing its role in finishing tasks and working hard despite obstacles.
Perseverance as a Heroic Quality
When we think about heroes in stories and real life, perseverance is often what sets them apart. It's not superhuman strength or special powers, it's the unwillingness to give up on what matters.
This heroic quality is something every child can develop, regardless of their natural abilities or circumstances.
And understanding your child's unique character strengths, including perseverance, can help you support their heroic journey more effectively.
HeroType's science-based character assessment reveals how your child's perseverance works alongside their other strengths through engaging heroic archetypes. When children see themselves as the hero of their own story, they're more likely to persevere through challenges that matter to them.
Character Development in Action
Character education programs have found success teaching perseverance through:
Personal storytelling: Students journal about their own challenges and victories
Hero studies: Learning about historical and contemporary figures who demonstrated perseverance
Visual reminders: Creating "perseverance walls" with encouraging words and student examples
Real-time recognition: Celebrating moments when students demonstrate perseverance in daily activities
Perseverance Examples: Stories That Inspire
Sometimes the best way to understand perseverance is through examples that resonate with children and parents alike.
Famous Examples Children Love
J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter Journey: Before becoming one of the world's most successful authors, Rowling's first Harry Potter manuscript was rejected by 12 different publishers. She could have given up after the first, fifth, or even tenth rejection. Instead, she persevered, and her persistence gave the world a beloved series that has inspired millions.
Thomas Edison's Light Bulb: Edison famously tested thousands of different materials before finding the right filament for the light bulb. When asked about his "failures," he replied that he hadn't failed—he had simply found thousands of ways that didn't work.
Walt Disney's Dream: Disney was fired from a newspaper for "lacking imagination and having no good ideas." His first animation company went bankrupt. Yet he persevered, eventually creating the entertainment empire that brings joy to families worldwide.
Everyday Perseverance Examples
Help your child recognize perseverance in daily life:
Learning to walk: Every toddler falls countless times but keeps getting back up
Mastering a musical instrument: Hours of practice, wrong notes, and gradual improvement
Sports training: Repeated drills, losses, comebacks, and skill development
Academic challenges: Studying for difficult tests, redoing assignments, asking for help
Friendship building: Working through conflicts, making amends, deepening relationships
Learning new skills: Whether it's cooking, coding, or crafting—every new skill requires perseverance
How to Teach Perseverance: Practical Strategies for Parents
Teaching perseverance isn't about pushing your child to exhaustion or ignoring their genuine struggles. It's about providing tools, support, and opportunities for them to develop this crucial strength.
Children learn more from what they see than what they're told. Share your own challenges openly:
"I'm finding this work project really difficult, but I'm going to break it into smaller steps"
"Learning this new technology is frustrating, but I know it'll get easier with practice"
"I didn't do well on my first attempt, but I'm going to try a different approach"
Set Realistic, Incremental Goals
Large goals can feel overwhelming. Break them down:
Daily goals: "Today, let's practice piano for 10 minutes"
Weekly goals: "By Friday, let's finish this chapter"
Monthly goals: "This month, we'll work on improving your free throws"
Celebrate small wins along the way. Each completed step builds confidence and reinforces the perseverance habit.
Build a Perseverance Toolkit
Help your child develop strategies for difficult moments:
Positive Self-Talk:
"This is hard, but I can learn"
"I haven't figured this out yet"
"Every mistake teaches me something"
Problem-Solving Steps:
Take a break when frustrated
Ask for help or guidance
Try a different approach
Break the problem into smaller parts
Physical Strategies:
Deep breathing when stressed
Getting fresh air or light exercise
Having a healthy snack if hungry
Ensuring adequate sleep
Research by psychologist Carol Dweck shows that praising effort rather than intelligence encourages perseverance. Instead of:
❌ "You're so smart!" ✅ "I love how you kept trying different solutions!"
❌ "You're naturally good at this!" ✅ "Your practice and hard work are really paying off!"
❌ "This should be easy for you!" ✅ "This is challenging, and you're handling it well!"
Create Perseverance-Building Activities
Puzzle Challenges: Start with age-appropriate puzzles and gradually increase difficulty. The key is finding the sweet spot where it's challenging but not impossible.
Building Projects: Whether it's LEGO constructions, craft projects, or science experiments, building something from start to finish teaches perseverance naturally.
Gardening: Planting seeds, caring for plants, and waiting for growth teaches patience and long-term commitment.
Learning New Skills: Musical instruments, sports, coding, or languages all require sustained effort over time.
Goal-Tracking Charts: Visual progress tracking helps children see their improvement and stay motivated during difficult periods.
Addressing Common Concerns About Teaching Perseverance
"Won't This Make My Child Stubborn?"
There's an important difference between healthy perseverance and inflexible stubbornness. Healthy perseverance includes:
Adapting strategies when something isn't working
Asking for help when needed
Taking breaks to avoid burnout
Evaluating whether a goal is still meaningful
"What If My Child Gets Too Frustrated?"
Frustration is a normal part of learning perseverance, but you can help manage it:
Recognize signs of healthy challenge vs. unhealthy stress
Teach emotional regulation techniques
Adjust difficulty levels as needed
Celebrate the effort, not just the outcome
"When Should We Let Them Quit?"
This is one of the most challenging questions for parents. Consider letting your child step away when:
The activity no longer aligns with their values or interests
They've given genuine effort over a reasonable time period
The stress is affecting their overall wellbeing
They've learned valuable lessons from the experience
The key is ensuring the decision comes from thoughtful evaluation, not momentary frustration.
Passion + Perseverance = Success
Remember that meta-analysis finding that perseverance alone accounts for only 1.4-6.3% of success? This doesn't diminish perseverance's importance—it highlights that passion and perseverance work best together.
Help your child find activities they genuinely care about, then support their perseverance in those areas. A child who loves soccer will naturally persevere through difficult practices. A child fascinated by science will push through challenging experiments.
Finding Your Child's Passions
Pay attention to:
What activities make them lose track of time?
What topics do they bring up repeatedly in conversation?
When do they show natural curiosity and engagement?
What challenges are they willing to tackle voluntarily?
Understanding your child's character strengths and natural interests can help identify where perseverance will feel most natural and rewarding. Tools like comprehensive character assessments can provide valuable insights into your child's unique motivational patterns and strengths.
Creating a Culture of Perseverance
Share stories of perseverance from your family history, your own experiences, and inspiring figures your child admires. Make it a regular family conversation topic.
Create family traditions around celebrating effort:
Weekly "perseverance highlights" during dinner
Photo documentation of projects from start to finish
Family high-fives for effort, regardless of outcome
When family members have different goals—whether it's a child learning piano, a parent training for a race, or a sibling working on a difficult school project—celebrate everyone's perseverance journey.
Teaching perseverance isn't about creating a child who never gives up on anything—it's about raising a child who can thoughtfully persist through meaningful challenges. It's about helping them develop the inner strength to pursue their goals, adapt their strategies, and maintain hope even when progress feels slow.
Start Where You Are
You don't need to revolutionize your parenting approach overnight. Begin with:
Notice and name perseverance when you see it in your child
Share one story of your own perseverance journey
Choose one small challenge your child is currently facing and offer perseverance support
Use growth mindset language for one week and notice the difference
Remember the Long View
The research shows us that perseverance, especially when combined with passion, contributes to academic success, emotional wellbeing, and life satisfaction. But more than any statistic, perseverance gives your child something invaluable: the confidence that they can handle whatever challenges life brings their way.
When your child faces their next difficult moment—and they will—they'll have an inner voice that says, "This is hard, but I can figure it out. I don't have to give up. I can keep going."
That voice, that strength, that perseverance—it's one of the greatest gifts you can help them develop.
Your child already has the capacity for perseverance within them. Your job isn't to create it from scratch—it's to recognize it, nurture it, and help them see just how powerful they truly are when they choose not to give up on themselves.
Ready to help your child discover their inner strength and develop perseverance that will serve them throughout their life? Start by understanding their unique character strengths and the passions that will fuel their perseverance journey.
References
PMC Research Study. Do Students with Varying Academic Ability Benefit Equally from Personal Qualities? National Center for Biotechnology Information. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6413889/
PMC Research Study. Beyond Passion and Perseverance: Review and Future Research Initiatives on the Science of Grit. National Center for Biotechnology Information. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7873055/
PMC Research Study. Why Grit Requires Perseverance and Passion to Positively Predict Performance. National Center for Biotechnology Information. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6176608/
Brain First Institute. The Power Of Perseverance: Insights From Neuroscience And Psychology Research. https://www.brainfirstinstitute.com/blog/the-power-of-perseverance-insights-from-neuroscience-and-psychology-research
KaiNexus. Perseverance: Why It Matters & How to Develop It. https://blog.kainexus.com/continuous-improvement/leadership-of-continuous-improvement/perseverance-why-it-matters-how-to-develop-it
Journal of Neuroscience. Neuroscience Research on Prefrontal Cortex and Executive Functions. Referenced via Brain First Institute.
